This is my favorite piece of abstract expressionism. I call it "Angst against a painting" Its one of my favorite pieces of art, probably because i don't do stuff like it very often. ok, thats enough art for one day. I'll probably dip into my store house and pull out more of my stuff later. 

James looks angry, but he isn't, he's just doing his hulk impression, incredable isn't it? 

This is my drawing of Worship. In order to worship God, we need to give all of ourselves over to him; we need to hand over our hearts, our very lives and say, "Do as you wish Lord." Worship and Trust are tied very closely together, you can't worship without trust, and you can't trust without worship. Surrender is what binds them together. 

i'm feeling very somthing right now

My emotions are goofy right now. I feel like a guy who just stepped in gurgling ucky brown stuff and ruined his new shoes, only to discover that its oil and realize that he's a millionare. Summer, finally feals like its here, and its a happy painful feeling. Today some of my friends left. It was hard to say goodbye, and there is still so many amazing people to say goodbye to, some of which i may not see until heaven. I love the comfort in that though, knowing that as a christian i never have to say goodbye. I am going to miss my family here at Prov. I have developed some amazing relationships. My brothers here mean the world to me, and the amazing young ladies here have taught me what it means to love them as my sisters in Christ. I couldn't have asked for a better experiance,God has been chipping away at me lots this year, forming me into somthing new. I got an email from pastor Mark this morning. It was just a friendly encouragement in preparation for whats to come this summer. it made me excited. I have that summer feeling deep within me now. its strange. Its the feeling like I'm leaving Bible camp and saying goodbye to everyone, but its mixed with the feeling you have when you hop off the bus, taking in a deep breath and the excitement of arriving at camp, not knowing what exactly comes next. I'm glad i don't know whats next, I am so excited. Maybe my stories will be able to compete with Andrew Krahns next year. Oh to swap stories with everyone of what God has done in all of our summers, I can't wait! I can't wait to go smudging with Danna...

empty handed

I took your photos from my wall and from my shelves.
Your smiling face no longer rests in my wallet.
today i gave you back to the one you belong to. I told him, "You can have her God, she's yours"
even though i didn't want to.
I was afraid if i gave you back, you'd never be mine again.
you were never mine though i thought you were.
I told you, "you got my heart"
when it wasn't mine to give.
I miss you like you were mine,
and i wish you were, but i forsake my first love.
We forsake our first love.
I don't know where this will leave us.
Maybe God's brought you on to that next step.
Maybe you've found that hand that fits yours.
God gave me the memories, but I'll give you up.
I need some time with my first love.
I'll be praying for you, that God will send you Prince Charming
who will catch you when you fall, who will tell you your're beautiful,
and listen to your every word,
who will be willing to die for you and love you less than God,
but more than himself

see the children

so i got the youth pastor job. I am pretty pumped about the whole thing slash scared, but scared in a good way...not a bad. yesterday i watched a documentary made by three college guys. Its called Invisible Children. If you ever get the chance, please watch this film. In my opinion, every middle-upper class American christian should have the responsibility of seeing this film. Wow, how ignorant i was. this film is about the children in Sudan and Uganda and how the civil war in Sudan is brutally affecting them. Children are being abducted and forced to work in the army. children 14 and under are forced to take guns and brainwashed to kill people. one child said that he would get headaches if he didn't see blood. It was so depressing and sad. war is all they know. many are orphans because AIDs has attacked the land as well. none, it seems, live with parents because they either run from home to avoid being abducted into the army or they are are taken by the army. many have no clothes, no food, no home. the movie showed drawings that the children did. every drawing had death, blood, severed limbs, sadness. this is all these children know. It ripped my heart out. the screen became blury as tears filled my eyes. I went on a walk after the movie. the sun was shining. houses and cars all around. christian friends taking breaks from studies to throw the football or play in the mud. I forget how greatly i am blessed. how selfish am I! I spend all the time thinking of myself when that is not my right. I hope that through being a youth pastor, I can trully demonstrate selflessness. I hope those images never leave my mind. Its my prayer that i become sensitized to the world and that i learn to give food to the hungry, clothes to the needy, drink to the thirsty, that i visit those in prison, and that i bring love to all

don't be spam mail

1 Wow! how flippin awesome it is for those
who don’t take bad advise from jerks,
Or kill time by chilling with the wrong crowd, letting them do their thing,
Or join in roast fests with bullies.

2 Instead, obedience to God is what floats their boat. Constantly His word is jogging through their minds, day and night.

3They are like the energizer bunny, they just keep going and going, never failing. Their batteries don’t die. They go strong and prosper; all they do is prime.

4 This isn’t the case for the punks. They are like spam mail that gets deleted without a look.

5 They’ll get what’s coming to them on Judgment day. Their tickets are void in the stadium of the godly.

6 The Lord has got his eye on those who are obedient to him, but those who aren’t are playing Russian roulette with a loaded gun.