Today I woke up bright and early (though I don't know what it means to wake up bright, I'm always a bit "dim" in the morning), even before I was supposed to get up for church. The telephone woke me up right around seven, and it was for me. Now let me tell you a bit about telephone in dorm. You don't answer it. You especially don't answer it at seven in the morning. You think to yourself,"what is that horrible sound that woke me up? Oh, the phone. Frick, who is calling at seven in the morning? Someone else will get it." No one else gets it. They are all thinking the same thing. Then after 15 rings, you are thinking, "Frick, why isn't anyone getting the phone?" and you get ticked off at everyone else in dorm. Eventually the caller hangs up, but then calls again a couple minutes later. You let the system happen again. "Someone else will answer." But just when you realize that no one else is going to, you think "Hey, that phone has been ringing for about 4 minutes, I bet if I answer the caller will be like, "What the heck took you so long to answer the phone!!!" and will be all mad, and so you decide, I better not answer the phone or I'm going to get reamed out for answering so late. Eventually someone does answer the phone and walks grogily (grogily,...I like that word) into your room to inform you that your dad has been trying to get ahold of you for the past half an hour. This is what happened this morning.
Dad called to tell me that Neil Thiessen's funeral was today. eil is a man from my home church. He passed away this week from a heart attack. Neil is one of those guys who you couldn't look at without the corners of your lips rising. I've been away from my home church for more than a year, especially as I worked at my church in Worroad, so I haven't seen Neil for a very long while. I hopped in my car and drove home.
Let me tell you a bit about Neil. Neil radiated excitement and love for Christ. He was a man who could eat more then anyone I've ever met. He had one of those amazing voices. When I say amazing, I mean horrible. He couldn't sing a note, but it was a voice you loved to hear. When Neil sang "there's a hole in the bottom of the sea" or recited the poem "Hiawatha" at camp or at Men's retreat, you had dang better be paying attention, because it was going to be a good time. Some adult men in the church intimidate a young guy at times (not on purpose of course), but not Neil. He was one of those guys that you would look at and, just looking at him sometimes would put a laugh in your heart. I hope you can understand what I mean by this; its a compliment more then anything else. He was one of those guys you would look at and think "Oh Neil..." and you would think it with a smile on your face. All this being said, Niel was a very special person.
Last week was what I like to call a "Job" week. Maybe that's not fair to Job because his experiences were far worse then mine (and worse then any other person I know), but I had one of those weeks were every bit of news that was brought to me was bad news (Which also means the bearers of the news had a much worse week then me as well). Then I finished off the week with Neil's funeral. I had never laughed more at a funeral. It lifted my spirits, and filled me with joy. I left the church refreshed, and appreciating the beauty of people and life a bit more. I could see the beautiful blessing that Neil's life had been for all who knew him, and I thought of the beautiful life that he is living now; a life that as a Christian, I know I can look forward to. I thought of the lessons Neil's life taught; the importance of fellowship, sharing, laughter, and of course; a full stomach.
I said that I experienced joy at the funeral. What is Joy? Joy is one of those words that you cannot define until you have experienced it, and even then it's hard, but I think C.S. Lewis does a pretty good job. C.S. Lewis talks of joy in his book, Surprised by Joy,
…...it is that of an unsatisfied desire which is itself more desirable than any other satisfaction. I call it Joy, which is here a technical term and must be sharply distinguished both from Happiness and from Pleasure. Joy (in my sense) has indeed one characteristic, and one only, in common with them; the fact that anyone who has experienced it will want it again. Apart from that, and consider only in its quality, it might almost equally well be called a particular kind of unhappiness or grief. But then it is a kind we want. I doubt whether anyone who has tasted it would ever, if both were in his power, exchange it for all the pleasures in the worldÂ… (C.S. Lewis, 1955, 20).
Yesterday was a sad day, but sadness accompanieded by the joy of celebrating an amazing mans life here, and in Heaven. Thank you, God, for your gift of Joy.
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
Sunday, October 22, 2006
Ode to Milk
oh dear milk, how beautiful you are to me,
you tame a mouthful of sweet, delicious torture.
companion of the cookie, mate to the brownie.
How could somthing sucked from a cow be so udderly devine?
you may be 2% but you are 100% in my heart.
gaterade may come and go,
cola will soon pass,
but our love endures, my sweet dear milk.
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
Won't you be my neighbor?
So today I decided that having supper up in the Sem lounge four flights up is a bad idea. I was thinking when i was on the first floor how funny it would be if somone forgot their silverware and had to go all the way back down to get it. Then when I got to the top, and told everyone how funny that would be,I realized that I did. Oh irony, you are such a jerk.
I remember watching Mr. Rogers as a child, and how as he approached the end of his theme song, he would sit down, cross his legs, remove his shoes and say, “Won’t you be my neighbor?” If only we all were as eager and willing to accept neighbors as Mr. Rogers. A man in the book of Luke Knowing that the greatest Commandments were to love the Lord your God with all your heart, and to love your neighbor as yourself, wanted to justify whom he should love so he asked Jesus, “Who is my neighbor?” Jesus responded with this story:
The dust was itchy in his eyes. It was a hot day, sun beating down on his back. His stomach was noxious from the up and down movement of the camel. Neither the air conditioning nor the radio in this camel was working. It was a pretty lousy trip. It was about to become a whole lot lousier. Hiding behind some rocks were a couple of thugs. They jumped him! Ripped him off his camel, stole his wallet, and ipod, tore off his American eagle robe, and Nike sandals, gave him a couple of kicks to the stomach for good measure and left him for dead in the gutter. Bloody, and bashed, he was looking pretty helpless at the moment. This guy didn’t have a hope, that is until a Jewish Priest walked by. If any one would help a hurting guy out, it would be him, right?
“Oh my goodness, this fellow is in some bad shape…what time is it?” He looks at his Rolex and realizes he’ll be late for an appointment if he doesn’t hurry.
“He probably got what was coming to him.” He huffs to himself, and looking from side to side to make sure no one else is around, he walks on.
Later a Levite casually moves down the road. He was headed to the temple to perform his duties no doubt, but a mound lying in the opposite gutter caught his attention.
“What is that?” He smells at the air? “Is, is that road kill?” He crosses to the other side to get a closer look, but when he realizes that it’s a man, and not some rotting animal, he quickly turns back to the other side of the road and continues on. Making sure no one steals his parking spot at the Temple is more important to him at the time.
Things were not looking good. The situation seemed as black as his bruised skin. A Samaritan walked on by. Now, in our books, “Samaritan” is a word that isn’t usually said if it’s not accompanied by the word “good”. A wise man once told me it would be like a North American saying the “Good Jihad Islamic Extremist Terrorist”, words that anger us when put together. The Samaritans were Scum to Jews. They were nothing more then mutts who had compromised their Jewish blood line by marrying into other people groups. Jews despised them. They would rather spend there time with brick walls then with Samaritans, if they could have their way. Yet it was the Samaritan who saw this man and took pity on him. It was the Samaritan who pulled out his first aid kit and put Neosporin on his wounds, rapping them with gauze and band aids. It was the Samaritan who took this Jewish man to the Holiday Inn, paid for his medical bill, and told the Keeper if the poor guy needed anything to put it on his tab. It was the Samaritan who showed love.
I find it interesting in this story That Christ chose someone his listener would despise to be the most neighborly. When Christ asked who was a neighbor to the man, his listener responded with “The one who showed him mercy?” as if saying “the Samaritan” would be too difficult to have pass his lips. Christ did this to show that everyone is our neighbor, and we are to love all people. I also find it interesting how it was the religious leaders who expected someone else to come along and care for the hurting. We are the church. Christ has called us to care for hurting people. Are we too expecting others to do the job Christ has given to us?
Matthew 25: 37-41 says,
"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'
"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'
Do we realize that when we are looking into the eyes of a hurting person that we are looking into the eyes of Christ. Perhaps we should all learn a lesson from Mr. Rogers, accepting all people as our neighbors. This is what the Samaritan did. ‘“Then Jesus said, “Yes, now go and do the same.”’
I remember watching Mr. Rogers as a child, and how as he approached the end of his theme song, he would sit down, cross his legs, remove his shoes and say, “Won’t you be my neighbor?” If only we all were as eager and willing to accept neighbors as Mr. Rogers. A man in the book of Luke Knowing that the greatest Commandments were to love the Lord your God with all your heart, and to love your neighbor as yourself, wanted to justify whom he should love so he asked Jesus, “Who is my neighbor?” Jesus responded with this story:
The dust was itchy in his eyes. It was a hot day, sun beating down on his back. His stomach was noxious from the up and down movement of the camel. Neither the air conditioning nor the radio in this camel was working. It was a pretty lousy trip. It was about to become a whole lot lousier. Hiding behind some rocks were a couple of thugs. They jumped him! Ripped him off his camel, stole his wallet, and ipod, tore off his American eagle robe, and Nike sandals, gave him a couple of kicks to the stomach for good measure and left him for dead in the gutter. Bloody, and bashed, he was looking pretty helpless at the moment. This guy didn’t have a hope, that is until a Jewish Priest walked by. If any one would help a hurting guy out, it would be him, right?
“Oh my goodness, this fellow is in some bad shape…what time is it?” He looks at his Rolex and realizes he’ll be late for an appointment if he doesn’t hurry.
“He probably got what was coming to him.” He huffs to himself, and looking from side to side to make sure no one else is around, he walks on.
Later a Levite casually moves down the road. He was headed to the temple to perform his duties no doubt, but a mound lying in the opposite gutter caught his attention.
“What is that?” He smells at the air? “Is, is that road kill?” He crosses to the other side to get a closer look, but when he realizes that it’s a man, and not some rotting animal, he quickly turns back to the other side of the road and continues on. Making sure no one steals his parking spot at the Temple is more important to him at the time.
Things were not looking good. The situation seemed as black as his bruised skin. A Samaritan walked on by. Now, in our books, “Samaritan” is a word that isn’t usually said if it’s not accompanied by the word “good”. A wise man once told me it would be like a North American saying the “Good Jihad Islamic Extremist Terrorist”, words that anger us when put together. The Samaritans were Scum to Jews. They were nothing more then mutts who had compromised their Jewish blood line by marrying into other people groups. Jews despised them. They would rather spend there time with brick walls then with Samaritans, if they could have their way. Yet it was the Samaritan who saw this man and took pity on him. It was the Samaritan who pulled out his first aid kit and put Neosporin on his wounds, rapping them with gauze and band aids. It was the Samaritan who took this Jewish man to the Holiday Inn, paid for his medical bill, and told the Keeper if the poor guy needed anything to put it on his tab. It was the Samaritan who showed love.
I find it interesting in this story That Christ chose someone his listener would despise to be the most neighborly. When Christ asked who was a neighbor to the man, his listener responded with “The one who showed him mercy?” as if saying “the Samaritan” would be too difficult to have pass his lips. Christ did this to show that everyone is our neighbor, and we are to love all people. I also find it interesting how it was the religious leaders who expected someone else to come along and care for the hurting. We are the church. Christ has called us to care for hurting people. Are we too expecting others to do the job Christ has given to us?
Matthew 25: 37-41 says,
"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'
"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'
Do we realize that when we are looking into the eyes of a hurting person that we are looking into the eyes of Christ. Perhaps we should all learn a lesson from Mr. Rogers, accepting all people as our neighbors. This is what the Samaritan did. ‘“Then Jesus said, “Yes, now go and do the same.”’
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
catterpillars
Who eats sauteed catterpillars with his college professor? I do, that's who. that is all.
Saturday, August 26, 2006
Bird crap, Jr. high girls, and future wives
I returned to school this week. I came back a few days early to hang out with Matt and to move my stuff in. When I arrived at school, I walked up to my dorm and noticed a sheet with a name on it sticky tacked to one of the doors. I got excited and read it thinking that it would be one of the guys in my dorm this year. "Gena Giesbrecht." I was a bit confused. I really didn't expect to have a guy named Gena in my dorm. Thats when I realized that Soccer camp was still going on and that I was in a dorm for jr. high girls, so I quickly removed myself, found Matt Shantz, and threw my crap in a room downstairs. My stuff sat in a total of three different rooms before Shantzy and I could actually move in last night. But it was a good time catching up with Matt, and bumping into a few other good people from school.
On Friday evening, we went out to Nuefelds place in the city and sat on his porch waiting for him to get done with work. we watched from the porch little boys and girls at a birthday party the house over. They had ponies! crazy. as we laughed at a little guy throwing grass at a little girl, a squwaking, morbid, bird flew into my face and pooped on my shoulder. This was my first encounter being hit in the face with a bird. its exploding feces landed on Matt too, but Nuefeld washed our shirts and fed us. what a guy.
Uncle Buck is a very funny John Candy movie. Eating candy while watching John Candy just seems to make sense.
I came back home today once again so that I can speak in church on Sunday, my last day there. what a nice happily ever after to the once upon a time I started over a year ago now with this church. my, how I am going to miss those people. what a blessing it has been. perhaps I'll blog on what I'll be speaking on sometime (Matthew 25: 31-45), but not right now. All I'll say is that I truly believe that this will be a passage close to my heart this year, one that I hope I can learn to live out, so that I truly can practice what I preach.
Probably the best part of going to school early is seeing the wish book before anyone else. the highlights so far,...The Thunder Brothers (could you have a cooler last name?) and picking out future wives for Matt and Mike. Shallow, perhaps, but still a good time.
So, school is here again. I am very excited. It is so cool to see growth in others and self. I can't wait to see what God has in store for Providence College this year.
On Friday evening, we went out to Nuefelds place in the city and sat on his porch waiting for him to get done with work. we watched from the porch little boys and girls at a birthday party the house over. They had ponies! crazy. as we laughed at a little guy throwing grass at a little girl, a squwaking, morbid, bird flew into my face and pooped on my shoulder. This was my first encounter being hit in the face with a bird. its exploding feces landed on Matt too, but Nuefeld washed our shirts and fed us. what a guy.
Uncle Buck is a very funny John Candy movie. Eating candy while watching John Candy just seems to make sense.
I came back home today once again so that I can speak in church on Sunday, my last day there. what a nice happily ever after to the once upon a time I started over a year ago now with this church. my, how I am going to miss those people. what a blessing it has been. perhaps I'll blog on what I'll be speaking on sometime (Matthew 25: 31-45), but not right now. All I'll say is that I truly believe that this will be a passage close to my heart this year, one that I hope I can learn to live out, so that I truly can practice what I preach.
Probably the best part of going to school early is seeing the wish book before anyone else. the highlights so far,...The Thunder Brothers (could you have a cooler last name?) and picking out future wives for Matt and Mike. Shallow, perhaps, but still a good time.
So, school is here again. I am very excited. It is so cool to see growth in others and self. I can't wait to see what God has in store for Providence College this year.
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Love is what separates us from the goats (Matt 25:31-46)
I just found this beautiful ministry and I encourage all of you to head over to www.myspace.com/towriteloveonherarms and check it out. Read through the blogs, especially the story that got this whole thing started. So encouraging, so inspiring. I can't think of anything that excites me more then seeing twenty somthings starting their own ministries and really loving the hungry, thirsty, sick, naked, and imprisoned. Here is a video clip for you to watch.
Know that you are loved. Know that God looks down on your hurting heart, and that He hurts with you. Believe. Believe that broken hearts can and will be healed.
Know that you are loved. Know that God looks down on your hurting heart, and that He hurts with you. Believe. Believe that broken hearts can and will be healed.
Sunday, August 06, 2006
a brain is no place for dynamite
Do you ever know precisely what you desire, yet wonder if its right. I mean, there are those times when we know what we desire is wrong. But what about those times when we just aren't quite sure? I suppose we have all faced this to a degree before, even if its as simple as wondering if we should take the last slice of pizza in the box, or if we should spend money on another cd after already buying two that month. These are the decisions that after a bit of thought, we can come up with a wise decision. But at other times, it is so much more difficult. Those times when your heart and your head disagree, when your voice can't be separated from God's or all the other voices in your head.
I'm in this boat right now. Its a really sucky boat. More of a raft, really. And no paddles. Out on rapids. Oh, and its held together by twine. Really old twine,...the kind you find in an old man's shed. An old, cheap man, who wouldn't bother to buy good twine, just so he can save a nickle. Yeah, pretty sucky. Is it that I just don't want to believe God's voice when I hear it because it contradicts my hearts desires? Is it that I won't allow myself to have what I want, or that I truly believe God has other desires for me? Is it that I'm thinking to much...Maybe not enough? I think I know the answer, but I'd love to convince myself otherwise. So, to all of my friends, will you pray for me? Pray for clarity, but even more so, pray for obedience, because clarity doesn't always make decisions easier.
I'm in this boat right now. Its a really sucky boat. More of a raft, really. And no paddles. Out on rapids. Oh, and its held together by twine. Really old twine,...the kind you find in an old man's shed. An old, cheap man, who wouldn't bother to buy good twine, just so he can save a nickle. Yeah, pretty sucky. Is it that I just don't want to believe God's voice when I hear it because it contradicts my hearts desires? Is it that I won't allow myself to have what I want, or that I truly believe God has other desires for me? Is it that I'm thinking to much...Maybe not enough? I think I know the answer, but I'd love to convince myself otherwise. So, to all of my friends, will you pray for me? Pray for clarity, but even more so, pray for obedience, because clarity doesn't always make decisions easier.
Friday, August 04, 2006
Thursday, August 03, 2006
Thoughts
Coke Blak. What were they thinking? I bought a Coke Blak the other day to see what it was like, and I'm pretty sure that I'll by another one just because it was so horrible that it will be canceled within a month and go down as the worst soft drink concept ever. The bottles will be worth a pretty penny. Lots of pretty pennies, and maybe some rusty ugly ones too. You know, coffee is great stuff, and coke is pretty darn good too, but making a coffee flavored soft drink is a bad idea. Sometimes putting two good things together makes something great, like Dr. Pepper with berries and cream or honey and mustard (do not put honey mustard in your Dr. Pepper). I would gladly give my kidney to the person who thought of putting honey and mustard together...even if he or she didn't need it. The genius who invented honey mustard deserves three kidneys. But then sometimes, two great things only make something incredibly horrible. I love puppies, and I love pizza, but puppy pizza just doesn't work in North American culture.
I had a good day today. Many times when I go into the office at church, I have a tough time keeping my eyes open, because I'm just not the morning person type. But today, I stayed relatively awake and I feel I got quite a bit accomplished. I'm beginning to prepare my sermon that I'll share the day I head off to school, my last day at the church. I am really excited to be given such a cool opportunity, it will round off my experience at the church very nicely. I only fear that my message will be to basic, to simple. But then again, I think that the church needs to come back to the basic, the simple. Sometimes the basics, the simple stuff offers the greatest challenge. Be Kind to your neighbor. Love your enemy. Feed the hungry. Such simple commands, yet so hard to do. Great challenges. In my time at the church, I've been able to speak to and work with pre k kids up to College students, and now I'll be preaching. What a great gift God has given me in this last year.
Today I folded bulletins at the church, and I loved it! That may sound ridiculous, but sometimes I really enjoy those monotonous tasks that need to be done but require chimpanzee intelligence. Most of my work requires thinking, so its nice to rest the brain, listen to some music and let the mind wander on the things of God, the things of the day, or the dreams of tomorrow.
We've had VBS this week, and I've loved it. I pray God blesses me with the opportunity to have kids of my own some day. Its like they breathe out life. I don't think there is a time that I feel more alive then when I've got a kid on each foot, one on my back, and another in my arms. I could do without the light saber stabbing and the shoe hiding, but I guess that comes with the territory.
video recording and catch; two more great things that don't work well together
I had a good day today. Many times when I go into the office at church, I have a tough time keeping my eyes open, because I'm just not the morning person type. But today, I stayed relatively awake and I feel I got quite a bit accomplished. I'm beginning to prepare my sermon that I'll share the day I head off to school, my last day at the church. I am really excited to be given such a cool opportunity, it will round off my experience at the church very nicely. I only fear that my message will be to basic, to simple. But then again, I think that the church needs to come back to the basic, the simple. Sometimes the basics, the simple stuff offers the greatest challenge. Be Kind to your neighbor. Love your enemy. Feed the hungry. Such simple commands, yet so hard to do. Great challenges. In my time at the church, I've been able to speak to and work with pre k kids up to College students, and now I'll be preaching. What a great gift God has given me in this last year.
Today I folded bulletins at the church, and I loved it! That may sound ridiculous, but sometimes I really enjoy those monotonous tasks that need to be done but require chimpanzee intelligence. Most of my work requires thinking, so its nice to rest the brain, listen to some music and let the mind wander on the things of God, the things of the day, or the dreams of tomorrow.
We've had VBS this week, and I've loved it. I pray God blesses me with the opportunity to have kids of my own some day. Its like they breathe out life. I don't think there is a time that I feel more alive then when I've got a kid on each foot, one on my back, and another in my arms. I could do without the light saber stabbing and the shoe hiding, but I guess that comes with the territory.
video recording and catch; two more great things that don't work well together
Thursday, July 20, 2006
I am the Prodigal
Faith without works is dead. So what does that mean for a church with no faith or works? Does it just become a club? Where is the spiritual growth in 4-H or the Eagles club? Those weren't the Eagles wings I had hoped to soar on. When was it that I died? How is it that a man can forget to breath? In all honesty, its been awhile since I've spent time with God. I haven't really spent much time reading my bible or praying this summer. Well, lets be a bit more honest, I haven't spent much time with God this last year. I have read my bible, and I guess I have prayed. But I haven't really prayed in so very long. Really truly prayed. Conversed with God, sat down with my creator and friend, and talked simply because that is what friends do. I want to now God's favorite color. Is that strange, does that sound ludicrous? I think of high school sweethearts and the trivial questions they ask one another, and the meaningless beautiful answers that they treasure, as they learn each other's hearts. What is God's favorite color. Is there a flower he finds most beautiful? To be in love again, to run back to the love of my youth, to be intimate with God. I miss him.
My, I have been off the mark for some time now. Yet its amazing how long God's arms are, he still reaches for me. No matter how fake, no matter how far I've wandered off the path into the wild poison ivy, he still calls me, still holds out his hand. One word has broken into my ears this summer; Love. Maybe I'm beginning to remember that word, a word I knew long ago. Maybe I'm beginning to understand it for the first time...Maybe I still have so much more to learn. Christ's greatest commandments have been on my mind a lot this summer, whether I read about them in a book or hear a pastor preach on them, it seems that God wants my attention. "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and mind, and love your neighbor as yourself." I am a people pleaser, and no person do I strive to please more then myself. I quickly forget the order of those commandments. God rarely receives my love first and rarely do I love others as I love myself. Doug Fields applied this passage to youth ministry in how it is so easy to "love" youth first by creating extremely fun programs to attract young people, but forgetting to love God, growing in our own personal relationship with him first. Without a personal relationship with God, how can one possibly help others grow in their walk.
A pastor asked the question, how is it that we love God, and he pointed out how closely related these two commandments are, because it is through loving our neighbors that we show our love for God. How true this is. It works in a perfect circle; the more we love God, spending time in his word and talking with him, the more we desire to love those around us by serving them and teaching them of God's perfect love, and the more we show love to our neighbors, the more we are demonstrating our love for God through action.
I have become ritualistic in my ministry. Love is the ingredient I have left out, and I've wondered why its tasted so funny. I've made it about programs rather then people, and I've pulled bible studies out of the air rather then spend time with my first love, growing and learning how to teach and serve the youth at my church, my neighbors. When I was young, my greatest prayer was that God would give me wisdom, and a heart of love, but somewhere along the line I lost that, I stopped praying for these things, and I forgot to love.
But my heart is hopefull. God in his grace has put excitement back in my heart. It amazes me that he is so willing to use a flawed heart to proclaim his perfect message. I have a month left with my church. This month is a gift. Working in Warroad has been such a great blessing. It has been a time filled with many important lessons. But the greatest of these is love.
My, I have been off the mark for some time now. Yet its amazing how long God's arms are, he still reaches for me. No matter how fake, no matter how far I've wandered off the path into the wild poison ivy, he still calls me, still holds out his hand. One word has broken into my ears this summer; Love. Maybe I'm beginning to remember that word, a word I knew long ago. Maybe I'm beginning to understand it for the first time...Maybe I still have so much more to learn. Christ's greatest commandments have been on my mind a lot this summer, whether I read about them in a book or hear a pastor preach on them, it seems that God wants my attention. "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and mind, and love your neighbor as yourself." I am a people pleaser, and no person do I strive to please more then myself. I quickly forget the order of those commandments. God rarely receives my love first and rarely do I love others as I love myself. Doug Fields applied this passage to youth ministry in how it is so easy to "love" youth first by creating extremely fun programs to attract young people, but forgetting to love God, growing in our own personal relationship with him first. Without a personal relationship with God, how can one possibly help others grow in their walk.
A pastor asked the question, how is it that we love God, and he pointed out how closely related these two commandments are, because it is through loving our neighbors that we show our love for God. How true this is. It works in a perfect circle; the more we love God, spending time in his word and talking with him, the more we desire to love those around us by serving them and teaching them of God's perfect love, and the more we show love to our neighbors, the more we are demonstrating our love for God through action.
I have become ritualistic in my ministry. Love is the ingredient I have left out, and I've wondered why its tasted so funny. I've made it about programs rather then people, and I've pulled bible studies out of the air rather then spend time with my first love, growing and learning how to teach and serve the youth at my church, my neighbors. When I was young, my greatest prayer was that God would give me wisdom, and a heart of love, but somewhere along the line I lost that, I stopped praying for these things, and I forgot to love.
But my heart is hopefull. God in his grace has put excitement back in my heart. It amazes me that he is so willing to use a flawed heart to proclaim his perfect message. I have a month left with my church. This month is a gift. Working in Warroad has been such a great blessing. It has been a time filled with many important lessons. But the greatest of these is love.
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Fireworks!!!
I've had a lovely little vacation here with camp. well, granted working as a dean of a camp can't really be considered vacationing I guess, but it was an amazing time. God is teaching me so much, and I'm excited to learn so much more about ministry. I've barely got my feet wet.
Family camp was great. I love Bluewater. I've always wanted to work there, but God always seems to have different plans. anyway, I just got back from spending the fourth out at bluewater, and decided to see if I could post some video footage. Grand Rapids shoots off some pretty good fireworks. I probably should have waited for the grand finale, but I didn't
Family camp was great. I love Bluewater. I've always wanted to work there, but God always seems to have different plans. anyway, I just got back from spending the fourth out at bluewater, and decided to see if I could post some video footage. Grand Rapids shoots off some pretty good fireworks. I probably should have waited for the grand finale, but I didn't
Monday, June 26, 2006
Summer pictures 3
I've also had the opportunity to go up to Winnipeg and visit my favorite people a couple times, here are there lovely faces.
I hang out with beautiful girls sometimes...
I didn't think that my best photo ever would be of Matt, but I thank you Matt for having a face.
This bug has nothing to do with anything
tree climbing is just to easy for some people. Steph needed the challenge of awkward, artistic architecture.
The Peg was fun, though I may never look at ginger ale the same ever again.
I hang out with beautiful girls sometimes...
I didn't think that my best photo ever would be of Matt, but I thank you Matt for having a face.
This bug has nothing to do with anything
tree climbing is just to easy for some people. Steph needed the challenge of awkward, artistic architecture.
The Peg was fun, though I may never look at ginger ale the same ever again.
Summer pictures 2
Here are more graduation open house photos.
It's always so refreshing to be surrounded by children. is there anything as beautiful to the ear as their laughter? I was in heaven....until one of them broke my badmintton racket...kids...
and of course i have to show off my church family and youth group.
These guys are at least a 7 1/2 on the coolness scale...maybe even a 12.
I hit my max again. dag.
It's always so refreshing to be surrounded by children. is there anything as beautiful to the ear as their laughter? I was in heaven....until one of them broke my badmintton racket...kids...
and of course i have to show off my church family and youth group.
These guys are at least a 7 1/2 on the coolness scale...maybe even a 12.I hit my max again. dag.
Sunday, June 25, 2006
Summer pictures 1
I got a camera this summer, yet I have not posted any photos yet, so here are some of the experiences and photos of summer thus far, starting with the most attractive child I have yet witnessed in life, John and Lauren's little boy, Corbin.
This one really accentuates the awesomeness of his very punk, very natural faux hawk. Next comes the tattoos and lip ring...
this was after I blinded him with 50-907 photos
Lyss Graduated, and pulled in billions of scholarships and grants (about $25,000+ just for this year!) since she's a genius. I got lots of photos at her open house and grad.
here is the family on graduation day. The parts in my dad's and my hair are in opposite directions. Isn't that aesthetically pleasing?
This is Lyss and her studly boyfriend.
open house!!!! I like food
Lyss had a pretty artastic gallery to show for herself
...wow. did you know that you can max out the number of photos you put in a post... I didn't. bummer....
This one really accentuates the awesomeness of his very punk, very natural faux hawk. Next comes the tattoos and lip ring...
this was after I blinded him with 50-907 photos
Lyss Graduated, and pulled in billions of scholarships and grants (about $25,000+ just for this year!) since she's a genius. I got lots of photos at her open house and grad.
here is the family on graduation day. The parts in my dad's and my hair are in opposite directions. Isn't that aesthetically pleasing?
This is Lyss and her studly boyfriend.
open house!!!! I like food
Lyss had a pretty artastic gallery to show for herself...wow. did you know that you can max out the number of photos you put in a post... I didn't. bummer....
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Please pray
I've never posted a prayer request on my blog before, but this is to important not to. An amazing young woman, and dear friend of my sisters and I, Emily Mekash, got in an accident today. While counseling at bible camp, she collided with someone during a game of basketball and hit her head on the pavement. She has been rushed in ambulance to the Hospital in Grand Forks, and there is a possibility that she could have fractured her skull. I believe that God has great plans for this young lady. Please pray for her healing, for her family and friends, and for Trust in a God who is greater then all of this. He is good and his love endures.
Friday, June 02, 2006
a hole in your pocket
Its funny how I never knew I gave you my heart until i found that it was missing. And the ironic thing is, you didn't know you had it either. so one day, as you skipped down the street towards the chapel, it fell from your pocket and shatered there on the ground. I picked it up, and dusted it off. My, how fragile a heart is. Though I try and try, the pieces jus't dont seem to fit together just right. And so it sits guarded, afterall, it's weaker now, it broke once, so it most definitely could break again. I could be mad, I could despise you, and I regretfully admit that there is a part of me that wants to, but I don't. Just a misplaced heart that fell from your pocket, its hardly your fault. I always have been a bit absent minded, always have been one to misplace things.
23 Above all else, guard your heart,
for it is the wellspring of life.--Proverbs 4:23
23 Above all else, guard your heart,
for it is the wellspring of life.--Proverbs 4:23
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
makes ears happy
their are few things that carry the power of music. it moves people like few things can. at times certain songs cling as a back drop to episodes of our life, or help us through difficult times. These are some of the songs that have stories in my life. They are the songs that have convicted me, challenged me, and have shaped me and my faith,...as well as some just plain fun songs that make me giggle and smile.
Lead the Way- Further seems forever
This is my favorite song of all time. It has come to comfort me, and carry me along in some very difficult times. "You know me better then I do, it would be best if you lead the way" Powerful, simple lyrics that reveal the surrendered heart of a Christian. Hide Nothing is my favorite Furtherseemsforever project. One of the most God glorifying projects I have heard to date.
Islands gone bad- Shapes and Sizes
These guys are a new band to asthmatickitty records, the label owned by Sufjan Stevens and his step dad. I love this song. Beautiful, unique Indy vibe, and a story that progresses from a family stranded on an island picking fruit off of trees to children eating their parents. Good song, good song.
Casimir Pulaski Day- Sufjan Stevens
Wow. Sufjan is amazing. I love this song, because the lyrics are sad, yet the music is happy, and combined they seem to paint a picture of hope. The song deals with suffering and Gods place in it. A tear jerker.
When did you fall- Chris Rice
This song is one of my new favorites. Its a love song about a guy looking back over his relationship with his significant other trying to place the moment she fell in love with him. www.myspace.com/chrisrice
Transcontinental- Pedro the Lion
David Bazen, the main mind behind amazing indy act, Pedro the lion, is known for his blunt, straight to the point, and often controversial music. His content and language has thrown some Christians for a loop as he has played major Christian music festival, Conerstone, and though I can't agree with his content and language choice all the time, there are a couple songs that have really struck home and I think are good to hear. His voice, and soft, relaxing music are not soon forgotten, nor his story telling abilities. Transcontinental is a story in which the narrator gets ran over by a train, and tells us about the experience. Yeah, no theological message in this one, just a ridiculously fun song. To bad their is so much dirt with the gold... www.purevolume.com/pedrothelion
On and On- Kevin Max
Although this former DC talk member seems to be forgotten quicker then Tait or Toby, I would say Max is my favorite of the three. His music is by far the most original. On and On is an amazing love song "You are an island, I am the raging of the sea, You are a Fortress, and I am abandoned, you are the valley, you are the bird that flies so high, you are a temple, and I am a beggar" Lyrically Max is amazing, and with a voice like that, you have to wonder why we haven't heard more of him
Priceless (For Eleanor)- Copeland
"I need you like the dragonfly's wings need the wind, like the orphan needs home once again, like heaven needs more to come in. I need you like you've always been." this is a beautiful song. All of Copeland's music is what I would deem "pretty" music. Its like candy for your ears. And not that cheap candy they throw at you during parades. This is the delicious candy you find in a candy shop, the kind that you have to close your eyes and smile as it rests on your tongue. Imagine your aunts special fudge at Christmas. Copeland is fudge....really good fudge.
Bold Son- Aaron Espe
For me, this song completes what furtherseemsforever's lead the way began. Both these songs are incredibly important to me. Though it takes great surrender to allow Christ to lead the way in our lives, it takes trust to boldly follow him. "So don't be timid, don't be cold, be bold son, be bold son." Aaron Espe is from my home town, and a great guy. Perhaps the fact that I know the guy contributes to my love of his music, but you can be the judge...(he's going places, just wait, I'm telling you...) www.myspace.com/aaronespe
Fly- Jars of Clay
"Be Still let your hands melt into mine. The part of me that breathes when you breath is losing time. I can't find the words to say I'll never say goodbye. I'll fly with you through the night so you know I'm not letting go. I'm not letting go. My tears like rain fill up the sky. Oh my love, I'm not letting go, I'm not letting go." I view this song as God's love song to me. He gave this to me over the radio on a night I desperately needed it. This song reaches deep into my heart, and I thank God for such a gift.
This World- Cademon's Call
"This world has nothing for me and this world has everything. All that I could want and nothing that I need." Cademon's call and Derek Webb both are artists I greatly respect. They speak messages that Christians desperately need to hear.
other amazing songs
Those words are not enough- Relient K
What is Love- Pax217
I'm not alright- Sanctus Real
Learning to Breathe- Switchfoot
We're very greatly loved- Half-handed cloud
Did i step on your trumpet?- Danielson
Autobahn- Anberlin
Jesus' Blood- Delerious?
Wait for me- Rebecca St. James
At the Zoo- Simon and Garfunkel
Lead the Way- Further seems forever
This is my favorite song of all time. It has come to comfort me, and carry me along in some very difficult times. "You know me better then I do, it would be best if you lead the way" Powerful, simple lyrics that reveal the surrendered heart of a Christian. Hide Nothing is my favorite Furtherseemsforever project. One of the most God glorifying projects I have heard to date.
Islands gone bad- Shapes and Sizes
These guys are a new band to asthmatickitty records, the label owned by Sufjan Stevens and his step dad. I love this song. Beautiful, unique Indy vibe, and a story that progresses from a family stranded on an island picking fruit off of trees to children eating their parents. Good song, good song.
Casimir Pulaski Day- Sufjan Stevens
Wow. Sufjan is amazing. I love this song, because the lyrics are sad, yet the music is happy, and combined they seem to paint a picture of hope. The song deals with suffering and Gods place in it. A tear jerker.
When did you fall- Chris Rice
This song is one of my new favorites. Its a love song about a guy looking back over his relationship with his significant other trying to place the moment she fell in love with him. www.myspace.com/chrisrice
Transcontinental- Pedro the Lion
David Bazen, the main mind behind amazing indy act, Pedro the lion, is known for his blunt, straight to the point, and often controversial music. His content and language has thrown some Christians for a loop as he has played major Christian music festival, Conerstone, and though I can't agree with his content and language choice all the time, there are a couple songs that have really struck home and I think are good to hear. His voice, and soft, relaxing music are not soon forgotten, nor his story telling abilities. Transcontinental is a story in which the narrator gets ran over by a train, and tells us about the experience. Yeah, no theological message in this one, just a ridiculously fun song. To bad their is so much dirt with the gold... www.purevolume.com/pedrothelion
On and On- Kevin Max
Although this former DC talk member seems to be forgotten quicker then Tait or Toby, I would say Max is my favorite of the three. His music is by far the most original. On and On is an amazing love song "You are an island, I am the raging of the sea, You are a Fortress, and I am abandoned, you are the valley, you are the bird that flies so high, you are a temple, and I am a beggar" Lyrically Max is amazing, and with a voice like that, you have to wonder why we haven't heard more of him
Priceless (For Eleanor)- Copeland
"I need you like the dragonfly's wings need the wind, like the orphan needs home once again, like heaven needs more to come in. I need you like you've always been." this is a beautiful song. All of Copeland's music is what I would deem "pretty" music. Its like candy for your ears. And not that cheap candy they throw at you during parades. This is the delicious candy you find in a candy shop, the kind that you have to close your eyes and smile as it rests on your tongue. Imagine your aunts special fudge at Christmas. Copeland is fudge....really good fudge.
Bold Son- Aaron Espe
For me, this song completes what furtherseemsforever's lead the way began. Both these songs are incredibly important to me. Though it takes great surrender to allow Christ to lead the way in our lives, it takes trust to boldly follow him. "So don't be timid, don't be cold, be bold son, be bold son." Aaron Espe is from my home town, and a great guy. Perhaps the fact that I know the guy contributes to my love of his music, but you can be the judge...(he's going places, just wait, I'm telling you...) www.myspace.com/aaronespe
Fly- Jars of Clay
"Be Still let your hands melt into mine. The part of me that breathes when you breath is losing time. I can't find the words to say I'll never say goodbye. I'll fly with you through the night so you know I'm not letting go. I'm not letting go. My tears like rain fill up the sky. Oh my love, I'm not letting go, I'm not letting go." I view this song as God's love song to me. He gave this to me over the radio on a night I desperately needed it. This song reaches deep into my heart, and I thank God for such a gift.
This World- Cademon's Call
"This world has nothing for me and this world has everything. All that I could want and nothing that I need." Cademon's call and Derek Webb both are artists I greatly respect. They speak messages that Christians desperately need to hear.
other amazing songs
Those words are not enough- Relient K
What is Love- Pax217
I'm not alright- Sanctus Real
Learning to Breathe- Switchfoot
We're very greatly loved- Half-handed cloud
Did i step on your trumpet?- Danielson
Autobahn- Anberlin
Jesus' Blood- Delerious?
Wait for me- Rebecca St. James
At the Zoo- Simon and Garfunkel
Saturday, May 20, 2006
play-dough heart
words can't match feelings
reality can't match dreams.
Its not what i had hoped for, I'm not what I had hoped to be.
frustrated when the image in my head doesn't match the strokes on the canvas.
And in it all, in this all, have I become jaded and dry?
When things aren't as they should be, when you fail me, when you miss my plan,
do i just give up?
When you touch my play-dough heart, does it crumble?
or is there hope?
Take my heart. press your thumbs in.
mold it, shape it, form it.
stamp it with trust.
More strokes will join those on the canvas, and the invisible ink will show itself, and a captivating picture will one day fill my eyes.
but it will be your picture, not mine.
reality can't match dreams.
Its not what i had hoped for, I'm not what I had hoped to be.
frustrated when the image in my head doesn't match the strokes on the canvas.
And in it all, in this all, have I become jaded and dry?
When things aren't as they should be, when you fail me, when you miss my plan,
do i just give up?
When you touch my play-dough heart, does it crumble?
or is there hope?
Take my heart. press your thumbs in.
mold it, shape it, form it.
stamp it with trust.
More strokes will join those on the canvas, and the invisible ink will show itself, and a captivating picture will one day fill my eyes.
but it will be your picture, not mine.
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