"But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give a reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect." 1 Peter 3:15

Sunday, December 04, 2005


I used to be an optimist. but every now and then things look so dark. I was the kind of guy that thought DC talk would get back together again. Sometimes life hurts. You are torn at the seems. mind exploding. past pains attacking. frustrations annoying. Searching in all the wrong places for comfort that cannot satisfy. Guilt punches you in the eye, while shame takes a kidney shot. You feel like everything is collapsing down on you all at once, leaving you lying in a pile of rubble, breathing in the dusty air, enveloped in the pounding heat of a pain thats more real than life. blackness hits.

Daddy, hold my hand. I need to know that you love me. I need to see you smile at me. Are you proud of me?

I don't care if the cup is half full or half empty, If it be your will, I'll drink it. give me the strength to drink it. I just need your help to tip it down. How I long to be Bold! But I feel so timid, so timid.

I feel you. Thank you for your warm hug. heating up the darkness.

Sometimes life seems so dark, but you'll flip the switch soon enough. I still think DC talk will get back together one day.

1 comment:

steph said...

well, i am glad you finally started posting again. no more slacking...

warming up the darkness.
it occured to me when i read that...that you cannot heat up darkness...i'm not sure why that occured to me. but its making me think.
maybe we become too preoccupied with darkness that we forget we are cold...and so we think that when we warm up that we have solved our darkness problem...but really, we have only beaten the cold, and we still have the darkness to deal with, only we need light not warmth...but we still keep searching for warmth...
this all kinda makes sense to me, but i know it makes no sense whatever written here...so The End.

ps. sorry if i succeeded in confusing you alot, i wasn't planning on it. Keep posting...